Tagging Douchebags…

dbagThis was a popular piece on the Intertubes last year. I don’t know why it resonated with so many people, but it did. I do have a theory though.

The cell phone earpiece or headset is actually a very functional and necessary item for those who drive and have to be on the phone. It just works. But it also is a very strange way to traverse this blue marble we call Earth.

Before these devices became ubiquitous, if you saw someone talking to themselves, you knew they’d kinda lost it. Now you check for the earpiece.

But still, how many of us have been in a checkout lane and had to listen to some numbskull on their phone talking too loud. It really is annoying.

It’s not really just a guy thang, but with the well documented male ego driving many a fellow to look cool at all costs. Witness sunglasses worn inside a building. So yes this is funny because, like most humor, it has its foundation in pain. The Urban Dictionary sez it even better:


The term “douchebag” generally refers to a male with a certain combination of obnoxious characteristics related to attitude, social ineptitude, public behavior, or outward presentation.

Though the common douchebag thinks he is accepted by the people around him, most of his peers dislike him. He has an inflated sense of self-worth, compounded by a lack of social grace and self-awareness. He behaves inappropriately in public, yet is completely ignorant to how pathetic he appears to others.

He often talks about how cool, successful, and popular he is, yet never catches on to the fact that he comes across as a total loser. Nevertheless, he firmly believes that he is the smartest, most desirable, and most charming person in the room… and will try to bad-rep anyone who would threaten to expose this facade.

He fancies himself a ladies’ man, yet tends to be a joke to all but the most naive of women. He tries to portray himself as part of the in-crowd (a fashionista, an upwardly mobile professional, the life of the party, etc.) but only succeeds in his own mind.

To everyone else, he is an annoying and arrogant phony who comes across as a wannabe overcompensating for his insecurities. He tries to appear like the center of whatever group will tolerate him, but in reality, he is just a tag-along who mooches drinks, women, contacts, social standing, and other benefits from the group… while contributing nothing.

About Gandalfe

Just an itinerant saxophonist trying to find life between the changes. I have retired from the Corps of Engineers and Microsoft. I am an admin on the Woodwind Forum, run the Seattle Solid GOLD Big Band (formerly the Microsoft Jumpin' Jive Orchestra) a GOLD sax quartet, and enjoy time with family and friends.
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